House Majority Leader Tom DeLay was treated for a heart condition Thursday at Bethesda National Naval Medical Center, his office said.
The Texas Republican was released and returned home after a series of tests. He intends to stick to his plans to go to Florida, Georgia and Texas this weekend.
Capt. Michael Curran, the head of cardiology at the hospital, stated: "We looked and looked, but found no evidence of anything that even remotely resembled a heart."
...I may have made that last part up.